Yup, men, you gotta love them in spite of..... Sometimes their minds ARE on other things. A guy had been stranded on a deserted island for a long time. All of a sudden a beautiful statuesque woman, wearing a wet suit with a lot of zipper pockets, walks out of the ocean. She says seductively , "you have been here all alone for a long time, is there anything I can do for you?" "I would love a nice cold martini with a lemon twist" he says. The woman opens one of the zippered pockets, takes out a martini shaker, ice, a bottle of gin and one of vermouth. Proceeds to mix up the drink, takes a martini glass out of another pocket, pours in the cold martini, puts in a twist and hands it to the man. " now, what else can I do?" she purrs "You know.....a nicely tight rolled cigar would go excellent with this drink." She opens another pocket, pulls out a large cigar, nips the end off and lights it then hands it to the man. Giving him her best sexy look, she says "Anything else?" Sitting with his back against a palm tree, martini in one hand and the cigar in the other, he says, "No, this is about as good as it gets." She can't understand why her seductive powers aren't working, "Don't you want to play a round?" The man looks at her is astonishment. "Hey, don't tell me you got a golf course in that suit?!!"

An older lady was lonely and decided that she needed a pet to keep her company. So off to the pet shop she went. Forlornly, she searched. Nothing seemed to catch her interest, except this one ugly frog. As she walked by the barrel he was in, he looked up and winked at her! He whispered, "I'm lonely, too. Buy me, and you won't be sorry." The old lady figured what the heck, as she hadn't found anything else. So, she bought the frog and went to her car. Driving down the road the frog whispered to her, "Kiss me, and you won't be sorry." So, the old lady figured what the heck, and kissed the frog. Immediately the frog turned into an absolutely gorgeous, sexy young prince. Then the prince kissed her back, and you know what the old lady turned into? The first motel she could find. (She's old, not dead!) *********************************************************** Mildred was a 93 year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, Earl. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, Mildred took out Earl's old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart, since it was so badly broken in the first place. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where the heart was located. "On a woman," the doctor said, "your heart would be just below your left breast." Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee. *********************************************************** Have you heard about the guys who drove their pickup truck into a lumberyard? One of them walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?" the clerk said. "Let me go check," replied the man, and he went back to the truck. "Yeah, I meant two-by-fours," he said, returning a few moments later. "Alright. How long do you need them?" The customer paused for a minute to think and then finally said, "I'd better go check." After awhile he returned to the office and said, "A long time. We're building a house."

More Stuff: 1. Clothes lines (Ever run under one while riding your bicycle? Gives a real meaning to the term, "clothes lined.) 2. Monday laundry day with the Maytag Washer powered by a small gasoline engine. (The engine could be cantankerous.) The washer sat outside with very little protection from the weather. 3. Introduction of the safety wringer. The safety wringer became necessary once the wringer became powered by a motor. Too many horror stories happened when the lady of the house got her hair or sleeve caught in the wringer. This safety feature came in two styles: 1) When an object got between the rollers that spread those beyond the normal diatance, the mechanism was tripped and literally came apart to disengage drive power to the roller. 2) A trip bar was placed in front to the wringers. When something got drawn into the trip bar, the mechanism came apart. In an emergency, a person could hit the trip bar to stop the wringer. 4. Fence stretchers. Used to intall barbed wire fencing. 5. Home made kites using weed stems for light weight sticks and newspaper for covering. (We had access to big, woody weeds called horseweed.) The paper was held by home made paste made of flour or corn starch. We raided the 'rag bag' for material to make the tail. 6. Rubber band powered model airplanes. (Not very effective.) 7. Cap pistols and Roy Rogers and LOne Ranger outfits. 8. Hand and foot operated air pumps for inflating tires. 9. Daisy BB guns. 10. Manual shifters and clutches - no automatic transmissions. 11. Hill holders - Kept the car from rolling backward while stopped at a traffic light on a hill. Ever try to go from keeping the car from rolling backard and shifting into gear to go forward on a hill? And do it smoothly? You needed an extra foot. 12. Brake light swithces were pressure switches plumbed to the hydraulic brake lines. Occasionaly, one would leak badly or the diaphram failed and caused loss of brakes. That's when the manual 'parking brake' became an emergency brake. In fact, in Model-A Fords with mechanical brakes, that little lever was called the emergency brake and it as needed. I know from personal experience. 13. Before combines, there were mowing machines, hay rakes, binders, and threshing machines. 14. Autos running without air cleaners could expect to need new rings every 20,000 to 30,000 miles. 15. Road draft tubes. Fumes from the crankcase was vented underneath the engine through an open tube. The end of the tube was cut on an angle. The air flow over the end of the tube induced a weak draft to help purge the crankcase. Where did the stuff go? On the road and the underside of the car. Look at photos of highways from the 1940s and you can obvserve an oil streak in the center of the lane unless the concrete was very new. This oil streak was a peril to motorcyclist when they leaned into a turn and happened to creep into this oil slick especailly if it was bit wet. 16. Steam engines on railroads. I remember the phase out of the last of these on the Balitmore and Ohio railway. 17. Hobos. 18. Huckster Trucks. During WW2 when everything was rationed, county grocery stores ran a panel truck route to their customers homes bringing basic items like bread, canned goods, sugar, spices, salt, etc. The made two runs per week. If an item was not on the truck on Monday, you could place an order and it would be delivered 2 to 3 days later on their next run. The huckester truck was given a gasoline alowance, but most farmers had only enough gasoline for their tractors and very little 'ration stamps' for tires. Autos remained parked for days on end. The national speed limit was 45 mph for private vehicles. 19. Bell bottomed trousers. 20. Pant leg clips - to keep pant legs out of the bicycle chain. - very necessary with bell bottoms. 21. Schwinn was a big name in bicycles. It no longer exists. I beleive that the tradename is still emplyed.

Clean off the paint and clean the slot. Use a screwdriver that fits the slot, the wrong size blade can ruin the slot. Most of the force holding the screw is between the metal parts. Several tips so far are good. Try the easiest ones first. Simply smacking the hinge with a smooth faced hammer can work. The soldering iron works, but it usually has to be a large soldering iron, the pistol grip electric ones do not create enough heat. I'm a big fan of impact screwdrivers, but in this case, that would be my next to last choice. Last choice is drilling out the screw.